Why yes, yes I am still using a dating site.
If only because I'm a social-butterfly an' I enjoy flirting.
It's also because I have myself way too much fun w/ the headline of my profile.

I don't like bein' standard, it's probably why I get so many hits.
The following are headlines I've been tempted to post, but know better.

- I don't bite... unless you want me to.
- The only thing you should take seriously about me is my penis.
- I thought a thought, but the thought I thought I thought wasn't the thought I thought... I think.
- I've been known to inspire crushes.
- I have this bad habit of stealing... hearts.
- I want to make you pregnant.
- I don't have a girlfriend, I just know a woman that gets really angry when I say that.
- I'm not an alcoholic, I just drink like one.
- I hate 41% of all stats.
- My reality check bounced.
- Perfect for sub-par, mediocre sex.
- I'm not a one-night stand person. I'm a multi-stand person. Sometimes I'll even lay down.
- I get what I want, or I change my mind.
- I haven't failed, I've just found myself 10,000 ways that don't work.

Currently, mine reads:
For best results, mix with water.